This one's for you, Mildred

For those of you breathlessly waiting to update my where and how-abouts, with your pushpins suspended over your darling homemade Kate Clinton tour maps, I apologize for my tardy check-in. Your arms must be sore. You know who you are. Mildred W. in Sioux Falls.
The reason for my silence is quite simple. The collapse of the Mets. I mean, I knew that the bee colony collapse which I have been following and chronicling for you, a bit obsessively some would say, signaled the beginning of other collapses – bridges, mines, the dollar, Oral Roberts University – but the Mets were way ahead of their division with just two weeks to go and they didn’t even make the wild card draw. Never has any team in baseball suffered such a precipitous end of the season collapse.
I have no idea what I am talking about. I am merely parroting the ESPN chatter that is the only thing I can safely watch on television without mild panic attacks. Rachel Ray gives me agita. Did you know that those big-necked sportscasters say basically the same thing hour after hour with maybe a few new scores here and there? They are very convincing in their endless enthusiasm. Does anyone ever randomly test them for performance enhancement drugs? I bet Balco delivers.
Speaking of which, I love Marion Jones. Now more than ever. She made an apology that was clearer than her clear and should be a template for all other apologies that we will never hear from Bonds, McGwire, etc. I knew she was roiding back at the Olympics and my feeling was give her more and let’s really see how fast that gal can go. Whining George Vecsey, eat my dust.
About that pushpin. I had the complete pleasure of appearing in DC with Norman Leer’s advocacy group, People for the American Way for their Liberty Awards. Richly deserved awards were given at the Kennedy Center to entrepreneurial philanthropist, Tim Gill; documentarians of “Jesus Camp”, Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady; Rutgers Women’s Basketball coach, C. Vivien Stringer and Madame Speaker of the House, California’s gift to double knits, Rep. Nancy Pelosi.
While I was onstage I got the international symbol for “keep talking” from the show’s producer, Joel Silberman, because the speaker was still on the hill trying to get the Children’s Health Insurance Bill passed. It passed. George vetoed it saying we didn’t have the money for it. That was the same day the Senate approved 459 Billion for war spending. I want my ESPN.
A few days later, I had the pleasure of attending the huge Out and Equal Workplace Summit also in DC. I attended panels and plenaries, got to hang with the amazing band Betty! and to be inspired by Toshi and Bernice Johnson Reagon. The 2300 attendees were fired up to continue to bring LGBT visibility and equality to their workplaces. I emceed their raucous awards dinner, a celebration of their good work. Justice is good business. Someone tell George.
Today I am gathering up the pinnies and the orange field cones for my annual Touch Football Game at Women’s Week. For those of you with your pushpins, Mildred, I’ll be in Ptown all next week for what we used to call “The Running of the Mullets”, but we are way too styling for that kind of talk now.